A funny thing happens to people when they have children. First, they consider that their new baby is the centre of the universe and the most exciting thing ever. That’s great. But then some parents take that a step too far by forgetting that their baby is merely the centre of their universe, and other people just aren’t really interested.
I have been excited by a few babies in my lifetime: my own Little Sister, my nephews and my niece, and the babies of a few close friends. That’s it. Babies just don’t do it for me. I think they generally look like cabbages for about 6 months, and they don’t do anything even remotely entertaining for at least a year. I don’t ask other people if I can hold their babies, and I don’t stop to admire babies in their prams. I don’t volunteer to baby-sit and I don’t change diapers.
Today I saw a headline on the Huffington Post that said: “Mothers Protest Airlines with Nationwide Airport Nurse-In”. Cool, I thought, I like protests in airports, so I went on to read the Washington Post article: Mothers Rally to Back Breast-Feeding Rights.
In spite of my non-fascination with babies, I am all in favour of breastfeeding. So as I read the article, I was waiting to be offended on behalf of breastfeeding mothers everywhere. Imagine my surprise when I found myself instead offended by the mothers, and specifically by the breastfeeding mother who had been escorted off a plane, thereby inspiring the protests.
First, the “baby” she was breastfeeding was not a baby. The Washington Post story had said only “toddler”, but looking round I found the kid was 22 months old. Yuck. But more importantly, the flight attendant involved in the incident had not told the mother that she could not breastfeed, s/he had merely asked her to cover up.
I would have done the same.
The protesting ladies say that breastfeeding is “normal” and “natural”. So it is, ladies, but so are masturbation and having sex. We don’t participate in either of those activities on airplanes, now do we? Certainly not without covering up!
I do accept that breastfeeding is good for babies. And I guess some women like having their nipples sucked raw several times a day. I completely support the right of women to breastfeed on airplanes. BUT I DON’T WANT TO SEE IT!!!
I don’t care how natural it is, I don’t want to be forced to look at your brat sucking your tit. Okay? Got it? Go ahead and breastfeed, but cover up and be discreet. The rest of the world is not enthralled by your child or your bovine motherhood rites.
Thank you.










