Drinking with Max's Mom

There had not been any alcohol at the post-funeral gathering, the reason being that Annie’s siblings are all alcoholics in recovery. So as soon as Max’s family got home, the bar was open. Max’s mom asked for a small black Russian, ‘small’ meaning that the 1 ounce measure should be used rather than the 1.5 ounce measure, so the final product would be a mere 3 ounces of alcohol rather than the usual 4.5 ounces.

Black Russian: 2 measures of vodka + 1 measure of decaffeinated kahlúa. That’s right: Max’s mom is health-conscious and prefers to consume her excess of alcohol without an excess of caffeine. Especially useful when one does not wish to risk a good night's sleep. You may be wondering where one gets decaffeinated kahlúa, and the answer would be that one makes it oneself. Here is the recipe:

Max’s mom’s decaffeinated kahlúa

4 cups water
3 cups sugar
12 slightly rounded teaspoons instant decaffeinated coffee
1 fifth 100 proof vodka
3 teaspoons vanilla extract

1. Dissolve sugar in water and then dissolve coffee into mixture.
2. Bring to boil and let simmer 1-1 ½ hours (uncovered).
3. Remove from heat. Allow to cool.
4. Add vodka and vanilla.

Makes almost 2 fifths.