Thursday, August 04, 2005

The Jester

I went to see The Jester today to change a prescription. The previous pills had produced a side effect in the form of a dry cough, which has been driving me crazy by interrupting my normally flawless sleep pattern.

The first thing I did was tell The Jester that I needed different pills. He was annoyed at me because the pills I had been taking had been working perfectly and now he would have to look in two different books and try to figure out what else to try. Finally he wrote out a prescription and then expected me to just go, but I asked for more.

“Monkey wanted me to ask if you would write a prescription for some more Viagra and Cialis.” The Jester reached once again for his prescription pad.

“How many of each does he want?”

“As many as he can get, I guess.”

“I’ll write him a prescription for four packets of each.” Pills here come in pre-packaged boxes rather than little personalised bottles.

The Jester then once again made as if I should leave.

“Um, don’t you want to take my blood pressure?” That was, after all, what I was taking the pills for.

“No, no need. I’ll just see that it’s fine and it doesn’t matter because you are changing medication anyway.”

“Well, I would feel better if you would take my blood pressure.” This was still a new thing for me and I didn't really trust that the medication would still be working just because it was working the last time.

Sigh. “Okay then.”

“120 over 80.”

“Oh, that’s good then. Thank you, that makes me feel better.”

“Well, it makes me feel miserable because the old medication was doing the job and now we will be dealing with an unknown.”

Then The Jester told the receptionist to charge me 40% extra because he had written out the prescriptions for Monkey too. Monkey keeps saying that we need to find a real doctor.


Devastatin' Dave said...

Looks like The Jester is playing fast and loose with the prescription pad.

Anonymous said...


Might want to edit the post. I don't know anything about Monkey's problems if there are any, but I know I wouldn't necessarily want people to know I was using Viagra or Cialis.
Not that it matters to me,
it's just one man's opinion.

Anonymous said...

Can you get me some oxycontin?

Monkey said...

No reason for an edit. Wanna see my boner?

Anonymous said...


no thanks, but more power to ya, brother.
Hit it hard and often.

Monkey's Max said...

I would not say that Monkey has a problem; more that he has a hobby.

Monkey, do you have that link to the guy in Russia who tested little pills with middle-aged prostitutes? People might find that of interest.

Monkey said...

Wow, it's eons old by now, but let me see if I can dig it up. RTM, mas pomoc?

Monkey said...

BINGO! Blog it!