Monday, September 26, 2005

The Joy of Fantasy Sports


There is a boy in both my football and baseball leagues who has been taunting me relentlessly on our message boards for the last couple of weeks. Don't worry about Max though, because I give at least as good as I get.

In my leagues teams go head-to-head, and I was playing said boy in both leagues during the week that has just ended. These are the results:

Football
Max 129.75
Dumbass Boy 74.55

Baseball
Max 8
Dumbass Boy 2

In addition to humiliating Dumbass Boy with that crushing football score, I have knocked him out of 1st place in the league. Max is a happy girl today.

SS, thanks again for your help with my football team.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Football as in the black and white ball you kick with your foot or the sport for whimps who needs to wear protective gear while standing around waiting to roll around in tight pants with team mates and the opposing team?

Donate Blood. Play Rugby!

Anonymous said...

The only thing sporting about soccer is seeing how much endurance you have to tolerate the most boring sport ever invented.

Monkey's Max said...

Chatsy, I hope the photo helps. Sorry, but blogger wouldn't upload yesterday. And what's wrong with tight pants?

SS, I refer you back to my post (whenever it was) about the Liverpool-AC Milan match. Soccer is not boring. Photo chosen to honour my highest scorer.

Anonymous said...

I would love to watch you sit and watch a game of soccer without taking a drink.

Monkey's Max said...

But, SS, why would I do that? That is why pubs have tvs.

Monkey's Max said...

Final results for the week, SS:
The guy I knocked out of 1st place has fallen all the way to 4th, while Max has moved up from dead last (14th) to 9th. Not a bad game.

Anonymous said...

mm,

my point is soccer sucks and the only way you can stand it is drunk.

Monkey's Max said...

SS, no. I watched the final at the Rose Bowl in the Olympics in LA in 1984 and I wasn't drunk.

Anonymous said...

MM,


In case you haven't realized 1984 was 21 yrs ago. Hardly a good argument.

Monkey's Max said...

SS, give me some time. I am sure I can think of a football (soccer) match I watched more recently without alcohol. The problem is that I only watch sports at the venue or in pubs. Any sport is horribly boring when you watch it on your own at home (with or without vodka).

Anonymous said...

Im pretty sure this debate is over. You have pretty much proven my point. I dont drink that much anymore and can hardly wait for sundays. Ill be watching the NFL from 1 till midnight, sober.

Monkey's Max said...

Okay, SS. But I would only watch NFL football under the same circumstances as I would watch European football. So you have not really proved your point at all.

Audie said...

Do people who brag about watching TV for 11 hours straight have any grounds for accusing others (soccer players, for instance) of being boring? Just a question.

Anonymous said...

Hey Audie do you know what I do the rest of the week? The rest of the year? Do you know that I go to school half time and work full time? I'll sit in the couch until there is a God damn ass grove in it if I feel like it and still have an opinion. And no one was accusing anyone of being boring just statiing the simple fact that soccer is boring.

Audie said...

All right, all right! Sorry -- just thought it was kinda funny....

11 straight hours, though. Jeepers. I can't even watch porn for that long.

Monkey's Max said...

Some soccer players are indeed really boring. They are known for being amongst the stupidest athletes in the world. Hearing David Beckham speak is torture, even more so because he has a stupid squeaky voice, totally un-sexy. But when you watch him on the field, he is dazzling.

I'd definitely rather talk to a cricketer, but that doesn't mean I want to sit around and watch a 5-day test match, taking breaks for tea.

Audie said...

And I thought golf was the reigning champ, anyway, for most boring sport. Soccer has an edge if for no other reason than the fact that I've never seen, upon the conclusion of an LPGA tournament, all the ladies take their shirts off and run around the course.

And thank God for that.

Anonymous said...

Nothing is wrong with tight pants I love looking for the bulge in some players. Hello! I went to the biggest football school in Canada, Gaiiiitooorrrsss Bishop's University raise a toast!
I prefer Soccer players, they have amazing legs and at least they can keep up!

Give Blood Play Rugby!